1) Before you decide, what kind of support is needed?

Many families start by asking, “Do we need a care home?” A more helpful question is:

“What support does my relative need day-to-day, and what would help them feel safe, comfortable and cared for?”

You might be considering care because of:

• Falls risk, mobility changes, or safety concerns at home
• Medication support needs
• Nutrition/weight loss, dehydration, or struggling to cook
• Loneliness, anxiety, or reduced confidence
• Increasing memory issues, confusion, or “wandering”
• Carer strain (you’re doing more and more, with less support)

The right next step is usually one (or more) of the following:

• A care needs assessment (what support is needed)
• A financial assessment (how care may be funded)
• A visit to one or two homes to compare environment, culture and “feel”

In Devon, adult social care assessments are handled by Devon County Council, and you can also use their advice and support pages to understand your options.

2) How to choose a care home with confidence

A good approach is to combine:

1. Your relative’s needs and preferences
2. Your family’s practical needs (location, visiting, budget)
3. Independent quality checks

In England, the Care Quality Commission looks at five key areas when inspecting services: whether they are safe, effective, caring, responsive, and well-led.

Helpful actions when researching homes:

• Read the latest inspection report and note strengths/areas to improve
• Visit at least once (ideally twice, at different times)
• Ask how the home supports changing needs over time

A practical “starter checklist” can be useful if you’re feeling overwhelmed. Care UK offers a helpful guide and downloadable checklist for choosing a care home.

4) Understanding costs, funding and assessments

Funding can feel complicated because there are different routes depending on needs and finances.

Common pathways include:

• Self-funding (paying privately)
• Local authority funding (after needs & financial assessment)
• NHS Continuing Healthcare (CHC) (if the person has a “primary health need”)
• Benefits support, such as Attendance Allowance (eligibility depends on circumstances)

Useful starting points:

• Age UK explains care home costs, council assessments and how fees can vary.
• For “top-up” fees (when a preferred home costs more than the council rate), Age UK has a clear guide.
• The NHS explains CHC, including how eligibility decisions and assessments typically work.
• Devon County Council outlines how to request/support a needs assessment locally.

If you want a simple overview of funding routes, Care UK’s guide to funding options is also a helpful read.

5) Moving in: making the transition easier

Moving into a care home is a big change for anyone.

What often helps most:

• Familiar items (photos, favourite blanket, small keepsakes)
• A simple, consistent routine at first
• A “getting to know me” summary (likes/dislikes, life story, what calms anxiety, how they prefer to communicate)
• Regular early check-ins with family and key staff

Care UK provides a practical checklist for moving in, including what to bring and how to help someone settle.

Dementia affects every person differently, and it affects families too. It’s normal to feel grief, worry, or guilt alongside love and determination.

1) Understanding dementia

A good starting point is Alzheimer's Society, which provides comprehensive UK guidance on:

• Understanding different types of dementia
• What to expect as dementia progresses
• Emotional support and practical advice for families

The NHS also provides an accessible overview of symptoms, diagnosis and next steps.

2) Supporting someone day-to-day

Dementia support is often about reducing distress and increasing reassurance.

Common best practices include:

• Keeping communication calm and simple
• Allowing extra time to respond
• Maintaining familiar routines where possible
• Looking for the emotion behind the words (fear, confusion, embarrassment)

Alzheimer’s Society has practical guidance on supporting someone and responding to changes in behaviour.

They also offer specific communication tips that many families find immediately useful. Click here and here.

3) Looking after yourself as a family member or carer

Many carers push through until they’re running on empty and then feel guilty for struggling.

You deserve support too. Alzheimer’s Society has guidance on carer wellbeing and coping emotionally.

For specialist dementia nursing support, Dementia UK provides the Admiral Nurse Dementia Helpline (expert advice and reassurance for families).

And for broader “carer” advice (benefits, assessments, practical support), Carers UK is an excellent resource.

Locally, Devon Carers offers free support for unpaid carers (including registration and signposting).

4) Planning ahead

When someone has dementia, planning early can reduce stress later.

Common next steps families consider:

• Lasting Power of Attorney (LPA) for health & welfare / finance decisions
• Reviewing wills, benefits, and funding routes
• Recording preferences (routines, likes/dislikes, what comforts them)
• Talking about wishes for future care, when the time feels right

For practical benefits guidance, Citizens Advice is a reliable starting point (including help with Attendance Allowance and how to claim).